Nothing to say this morning

What do you do on mornings when you have nothing to say?

"Write anyway."

Yeah, but...

Sure I could write a "morning page." (See The Artist's Way for more information.) But BLOG it? Not so sure.

I could tell you that I got up and dressed and walked Philip to the bus, then did a power-walk that made my legs feel GOOOD....

And I could tell you that I'm now sitting on the back deck listening to a bright-red cardinal sing his heart out as he seeks a mate, while the chirping wrens feed on the fresh seed I just put out, and while the cats watch, waiting for their chance (that I won't allow them to have).

I could tell you that there's nothing quite like the morning light as it comes over the hill and illuminates the large tulip poplar before me, and how the leaves respond to the light with that spring green color I didn't know existed in nature before moving here, and how it almost vibrates against the absolutely clear blue sky behind.

This is my morning today.

Don't let success slow you down

On Friday of last week, I had a little success.

A good call with a prospective client. A 99% likelihood that I'll get the contract. A set of next steps for moving forward. A timeline in place for responding.

Parallel to that, I have (this week) a small job for a colleague-friend.

With pressure reduced and given some breathing room, what do I do? I took a day off on Monday. No blog post! 8-O (But I did get in a good 15-mile bike ride.)

Such a choice can be perfectly fine. But I know myself. I know that when I get off track, I have to work doubly hard to get back on track.

So I'm back here, blogging, admitting my weakness, and hauling myself back onto the rails.

The good news? Last week, I also mapped out THIS week's goals, so I have a road map for the week. I'm not starting from scratch.

The Key: A schedule, a routine

The routine of 9-5 provides a structure for employed persons to complete and make progress on the items of their job description.

When unemployed, this externally-imposed structure goes away. Initially, this feels great. Like a vacation. And certainly, those of us who have chosen self-employment understand the joy of creating our own schedule.

That said, the creation of a schedule is key to making progress-- no matter what state of employment (or lack thereof) you're in. And at least for me (and I doubt I'm alone in this), sticking to a schedule and routine does not come easily.

I've been working on (with various degrees of success) creating my own schedule-- at least for M-F. And with a special focus on the beginning of the day because I find that if I can get myself off to a good start, I'm much more likely to end the day feeling accomplished.

Here's mine; what's yours?

6:30 alarm goes off. Yes, while I don't have to get up early, I choose to get up early. I wait in bed until Garrison Keillor has read his poem on The Writer's Almanac. Then I get up and make us espresso, feed the cats, etc etc.

7:30 Dressed (this is key!), I get out of the house (also key!) and walk with Philip to the bus stop-- it's about three-quarters of a mile each way. On the way back, I often go out of my way and walk through the neighborhood, trying to stretch the total walk to 2 miles. Some days I walk the neighbor's dog. Some days I go through the woods and look for the latest wildflowers. Other days, I take my bike for a longer ride along the canal. The point is this: exercise outside in fresh air for at least 30-40 minutes.

8:30-9:30 (depending on the length of walk/ride): This is the tough time for me. This is where I can easily get distracted.

Upon returning home, I might swing through the yard to see how the garden is coming. I may weed. At some point, I make myself another cup of coffee and a bowl of granola-fruit-yogurt.

What I'm trying to do now is use this time to write my blog. But sometimes, I find that the morning has shot by because I get caught up in email or facebook or web-surfing, and before I know it, Kojo Nnamdi has come on the radio which means it's noon, and I haven't written a thing.

A note on distractions. Some distractions may not be bad. But instead of starting with them, end with them. Reward yourself with them after you've accomplished something on your list of goals. I love to do genealogy. But I can spend hours on it. And if I get started, the whole day can disappear. Now, it's a reward: when I've accomplished goals a, b and c, then I'll give myself permission to spend some time on it.

Another thing helps with that morning slot is to know just what it is I need or want to accomplish each day. This makes a HUGE difference. I choose no more than three things at any given time. And I write them down as if they are done:

1. The car has passed emissions
2. The taxes are submitted
3. The consulting proposal to ABC organization has been sent in

I may (and do) have a much longer list. But I list no more than three at a time, the things I really really want done.

These things make up the rest of my day.

At the end of the day, I check them off my list and make my list for the next day.

In part because of the work I've started with the book Work With Passion, I'm also asking myself at the end of each day: What did I feel best about today? When did I experience the greatest "passion"?

So what's your schedule, your routine?

What's Next?

I spent my 50th birthday at Esalen, near Big Sur, California. I walked, I read, I ate, I soaked, I wrote. And I came away telling the Universe that this would be the year I would listen for what's next in my life.

Six weeks later, I was laid off from my job. Message from the Universe #1.

Yes, I know. There's an economic crisis going on. People are getting laid off all over the country. So this is some message, just for ME? Hey. I choose to see it that way. If it helps me design what's next for me, so be it.

And this blog? I'm also designing it to help me figure out what's next.

Another six weeks have gone by. I spent the first two "on vacation." Reading, eating, sleeping. Then I got bored. I looked for things to do around the house. I had the car's emissions tested and approved. I finished and sent in the taxes. I took in dry cleaning that's been hanging around the house for weeks. I was still bored.

I started updating my various "professional" things. My resume. My bio. My LinkedIn profile. I signed up for the job listings in my field. I signed up for unemployment. But still couldn't quite get into gear, professionally.

I signed up for an art class. I got out my paints, my brushes, my paper and canvas. I started walking and riding my bike in the mornings. I bought and planted perennials and herbs and vegetables. I pulled weeds and ivy. I read, I ate, I slept.

Somewhere in there, I had dinner with a colleague-- another woman exploring what's next. (Message #2: Find a buddy.) We ended up at the bookstore. She bought Nick Lore's Pathfinder. I bought the new edition of What Color is Your Parachute, and also a revised edition of a book I'd used 20 years ago: Work with Passion.

I brought them home. I forgot about them.

Until yesterday.

I opened up the second one. I started journaling along with it.

And then I thought, let's blog about this.

Why?!

1. I need a structure, a commitment, a goal. If I commit, if I promise to you that I will write here at least a few times a week, I will be in action and I will make progress. One inspiration was this woman's A Drawing A Day. It's pretty ballsy to commit publicly to making and posting a drawing every day.

2. One of the things I'm passionate about is writing. Blogging is writing. So consider it a regular practice. Inspiration here? The Artist's Way Morning Pages. Not that I'll use this blog for morning pages, but for the practice of writing every single day.

3. I figure: I'm not the only one struggling. I'm 50, I'm unemployed after a strong career of two decades, and I'm wondering what's next. I bet somebody else out there is similarly struggling. Maybe we can help each other.

So... let's get started. What's Next? Work with Passion by Nancy Anderson.